Divorce Financial Sense LLC

03/06/2026

Writing Workshop for Women Leaving Long Term Marriages

My colleague, Kristin M. Ploetz, is offering a virtual writing workshop that may be of interest to you.

Split: The Difference | A Virtual Writing Workshop for Women Leaving Long-Term Marriages. In this workshop, Kristin will combine her expertise as a certified divorce coach with an MFA in creative writing to inspire participants to reflect and write about themselves in cathartic, expressive ways. More information can be found here (including registration link): https://kmpcoachingllc.com/split-the-difference-virtual-writing-workshop/

Runs for 6 weeks starting April 1 and class size is limited. Cost: $180.00. All levels of writer welcome, including first-timers!

Please share with anyone who identifies as a woman, transgender, or nonbinary who you think might benefit from this opportunity.

Kristen M. Ploetz - CDC Certified Divorce Coach
KMP Coaching LLC
617-784-4770
www.kmpcoachingllc.com

You don’t have to go through divorce alone. In fact, you shouldn’t. Adequate support is essential to navigating divorce. I’m a CDC Certified Divorce Coach® and I’ve been in your shoes.

01/06/2025

GOODBYE WEP and GPO

On Sunday, January 5, 2025, President Joe Biden signed the Social Security Fairness Act.

The Social Security Fairness Act repeals the Windfall Elimination Provision (WEP) and Government Pension Offset (GPO) provisions of Social Security.

The new law removes the Social Security formulas that either reduced or eliminated the benefits of certain government retirees who receive(d) a public pension. This includes, among others, teachers, firefighters, and police officers.

Eligible public employees will also receive a lump sum payment for what they would have received in 2024.

For those of you who are divorced or in the midst of a divorce and receiving a public pension, this may significantly impact your right to not only collect your own Social Security benefits (WEP) but may also impact your ability to potentially be able to collect on your ex-spouse (GPO).

Goodbye to the WEP and the GPO – we’re glad to see you go!

12/16/2024

In early December, friends and I spent an R & R (Retreat & Renewal) Day at Kripalu Center for Yoga & Health. I eagerly pre-registered for the morning guided hike only to arrive and find it had been cancelled due to the day’s extreme cold and wind. Undeterred, I changed clothes and signed up for a yoga class. Cancelled, too! Now, grumpy and unhappy, I perused the schedule and found a choice between a session on walking meditation and chanting or a session on soul journey and retrieval. Those of you reading this who know me are already laughing. Those are so not Renee, you are saying. Weighing my options, I chose the walking meditation and entered class with less than a positive attitude.

One and a half hours later, I left the session calm, relaxed, refreshed and very content. Two weeks later I continue to use the skills I learned that day by chanting when life gets overwhelming (or sometimes just when that silly Christmas song gets stuck in an endless loop in my head). I have learned that you can tap sa, ta, na, ma while sitting in a car in holiday traffic or waiting in a dentist’s office. While these may not be the way in which meditation and chanting are intended to be used, they work for me.

So, you say, this is a divorce blog, Renee. Where are you going with this? Well, in the iconic words of Mick Jagger: You can't always get what you want, but if you try sometime, you just might find you get what you need.

As the holiday season gathers steam it can be hard to feel that your divorce, or its aftermath, provides anything positive in your life. Pictures of friends and their families overwhelm in greeting cards and on Facebook posts. Memories of holiday traditions may make it a sad and difficult time, more so if you were not the one who wanted the divorce.

Many years post my own divorce, which was not what I wanted, I can look at where I am and know that I have indeed found what I need: a loving partner, wonderful friends, a career and volunteer work that inspire me, adventurous travel all over the world, new hobbies and grown children who make me proud to be their Mom every day.

My wish for you for the coming year is to try and find what you need for 2025.

Happy Holidays and Happy New Year

09/16/2024

September 24, 2024 at 6:30 - Join me for Money & Divorce: Costly Mistakes You Don't Want to Make.
Register at Shawsheen Tech https://shawsheentech.asapconnected.com/ =57948

09/05/2024

FOUR WORDS

At some point 4 words were spoken: “Will you marry me?”.
Now, 4 more words have been spoken: “I want a divorce”.
Looking ahead and navigating your divorce you will need 4 new words: own, owe, in, out.
From the exhilaration of “will you marry me” to the devastation of “I want a divorce” comes the security of “own, owe, in, out”.

Fall brings a fresh start after the lazy days of summer. Now it’s time to educate yourself and take control of your financial situation.

What do you own: home, condo, vacation property, checking account, savings account, investment/brokerage accounts, car, retirement plans, annuities, pension

What do you owe: mortgage, home equity line, car loan, school loan, credit card debt

What’s coming in: employment income, investment income, alimony, child support, social security, pension

What’s going out: all fixed/necessary expenses such as mortgage, rent, home insurance, car payment, health insurance, food, cell phone; all discretionary expenses such as cable, vacations, eating out

One indisputable fact of divorce is that two households cost more to operate than one, but your combined total income is unchanged. A post-divorce lifestyle may look very different than the one you had while married. Your strength and security will be aided by a firm understanding of your finances. Will your income meet your expenses? What will happen when child support or alimony ends?

Gather statements for all of your assets (what you own) and your liabilities (what you owe). This is your net worth
Track all sources of income (what’s coming in) and track all expenses (what’s going out). This is your cash flow or budget.

Understanding your financial picture will enable you to negotiate a settlement and have a solid foundation for a new life.

06/18/2024

We are having a heat wave! Join me today at Sully's Ice Cream in Chelmsford from 4-6 to learn about Social Security and to eat ice cream. Social Security is an important consideration as you go through your divorce. Come "Get the Scoop".

03/19/2024

Join me for Money & Divorce: Costly Mistakes You Don't Want to Make.
We will cover 8 financial mistakes you can't afford to make in your divorce.
Shawsheen Tech HS in Billerica, MA
Thursday, March 21st from 6:30 to 8:30
Adult Education Catalog / Adult Ed Catalog (shawsheentech.org)

12/13/2023

DIVORCE AND HOLIDAYS

In the midst of holiday celebrations, I would like to reach out to those of you going through a divorce, as well as those of you spending your first holiday post-divorce. This season of family and tradition can be a sad and difficult time, especially if this is the first holiday without your children.

I urge you to take care of yourselves: eat well, get plenty of sleep, don’t drink too much and remember to exercise. Do reach out to friends, make sure you have plans for the holidays and contingency plans in case the first set falls through. It can help to have a good book on hand, a pod cast to listen to or Netflix movie you’ve been meaning to watch. This may even be the holiday to get away from it all with a mini vacation.

If you are hosting the holiday, you might consider changing some of the family traditions and starting something new that will make the holiday yours – even if it’s only the stuffing recipe!

Most of all, allow yourself time to grieve. Divorce is a loss. Trying to smile bravely, soldier on and sweep it under the rug doesn’t make it go away and doesn’t help you heal. So go ahead and cry – you’re entitled – then eat some turkey, some pumpkin pie and count a blessing…..or two.

I wish you well as we look forward to 2024.

10/24/2023

Join me for Money & Divorce: Costly Mistakes You Don't Want to Make. We will cover 8 financial mistakes you can't afford to make in your divorce.

Shawsheen Tech HS in BIllerica, MA Tuesday October 24 from 6:30 to 8:30 https://www.shawsheentech.org/Domain/151

Newton South HS in Newton, MA on Thursday October 26 from 6:30 to 8:30 pm https://registration.xendirect.com/nce/searchResults.cfm?catID=7

09/17/2023

This month's AARP Bulletin has valuable financial advice. It's important to talk with family members about their finances and about yours

07/13/2023

WHAT’S IMPORTANT ABOUT MONEY TO YOU?

Divorce is a time to look closely at the issue of money - specifically, will what you have be enough?

There’s often no easy answer.

You can find lots of formulas online:
• 3-6 months of expenses in an emergency fund
• 3x your current salary by age 40
• 4x your current salary by age 45
• 8 times (X) your salary by age 60

BUT, In the end, those are just formulas.

I have clients who live comfortably on social security and not much more. I have other clients for whom millions are not enough.

What makes the difference? Lifestyle certainly.

But more notably – what’s important about money to them.

Everyone has attitudes about money, many of which were shaped in our childhoods. Why we save, or don’t save, why we spend, or don’t spend, what amount of money in the bank makes us feel comfortable. These are all ingrained.

Money may mean:
• Security
• Love
• Power
• Status
• Independence
• Freedom
Money may be:
• A tool
• A means to an end
• THE end

Most of us probably grew up with parents who didn’t talk about money. In fact, most of us would probably rather talk about our s*x lives than tell each other how much we earn!

Did you know, however, that understanding what money means to you can actually help you set financial goals that are realistic and comfortable for you?

While I’m not certain of the question’s origins, I first learned of it over a decade ago when I attended a seminar by Bill Bachrach. It was about the importance of understanding your values when making major financial decisions.

The purpose of the exercise I’m going to describe isn’t to think in terms of goals. It’s meant to go deeper than that, or to get at the reason why we have certain goals. The first answers people come up with are usually easy — things like security and freedom. But once we pause and really think, we can move even deeper still, or into what might be called the “why” of money. This question can get uncomfortable because it forces us to get really clear about our underlying reason for doing things. It also forces us to face some inconsistencies in our lives.

This is a great exercise to do when going through a divorce. In fact, at that seminar all those years ago, I was in the midst of my divorce and panicking about finances. If possible, do this with a friend but you can also do this by yourself.

Each of you asks the other (or yourself): What important about money to you?
The answer to that question – let’s say security – becomes the next question.
What important about security to you?
The answer to that question becomes the next question – whether it’s one word or a whole sentence

Keep going until you’ve done about 7 or 8.

For me, the inconsistency is time – money to me is security, freedom from worry, which allows me to do the things I love, spend time with people I love, give back to the community, and learn new things.

But when I find myself working late nights and weekends am I losing sight of my own personal “why” of money? Am I working more hours to make more money and not having enough time?

When you’re arguing with your ex-spouse about asset division, child support or alimony are you losing sight of your own personal “why” of money?

12/02/2022

A stunning sculpture on the grounds of the DeCordova Museum caught my eye.

The sculpture is entitled Song of the Broken Chains, 2020 by Melvin Edwards. The accompanying explanation states: “the links in Song of the Broken Chains are monumental in scale, with broken fragments suggesting both liberation and rupture...”

How interesting that I too had used a chain motif as the picture on my divorce website. Mine shows a length of paper clips fastened into a chain with the middle one broken. More interesting, in my mind, was that I had used it to show the “rupture” and had never even considered the “liberation”. Clearly you can tell on which side of the divorce I had fallen!

Most people do mourn a divorce as a loss or rupture. If you are in the early stages of your divorce, please do take the time you need to grieve and heal. Once the divorce is behind you, however, take the time to look at how it may have given you a second chance, a new direction or a liberation.

Many years later I realize that divorce has changed my life in many positive ways: I became a CDFA and started a business that gives me purpose every day; I developed interests in hiking and kayaking; I have travelled, and continue to travel, all over the world; I’ve made wonderful new friends. While there is still sadness sometimes over the loss, my world has opened up.

This holiday season I wish you hope, joy and new vistas to explore.