04/06/2024
This is funny and a great read.
Solar Eclipse Monday, which is a perfect time to remind everyone of our 2017 eclipse rules.
Monday, April 8th, at around 2:15PM there will be a solar eclipse of the sun. How dark it may get in Braintree is anyone's guess, however NASA is putting the “02184” at 92% coverage around 3:30.
Please do not panic, as it is not the end of the world as we know it. That said, we wanted to advise you of a few things.
1. Just as with any first snowfall of the season, we expect each of you to begin panicking today. Do not wait until Sunday night to buy bread and milk. As masses descend to grocery stores the shelves will be empty and you'll be stuck buying spray cheese, Flaming Hot Cheetos and store brand golden grahams. For some of you, that might make your day.
2. Don't look at the eclipse. Once again don't do it. Doing so will turn you into a zombie from the Walking Dead, and you'll wish you had listened to us in the first place.
3. Your sunglasses will not protect you. Amazon still has "stare directly at the sun glasses", and if you act now, there are some on Ebay for a mere $39.99.
4. Feel free to hold "solar eclipse / end of the world" parties. If you do, please be respectful of your neighbors or you may get a visit from us. If we come, we can all ohh and ahh over the fact it's dark at 3:30 together.
5. Little ones, and maybe some adults as well, don't understand the dangers and may want to look at the sun. Please tell your kids that it's dangerous as well.
6. Expect trendy / annoying hashtags for the solar eclipse to start popping up on snapface, Instagram, and Facebook. There is nothing we can do about it. After a few days it will pass and you'll have a new set of trendy hashtags to be annoyed at.
7. If driving, do not wear eclipse sunglasses while driving. Do not try and take selfies with the eclipse while driving. Keep your eyes on the road.
8. Don’t crime during the eclipse. In 2017, some decided it would be a good time to do so….. It ended poorly for them.
As always, if you need us, give us a ring.
🌞🌖🌗🌘🌑🌒🌓🌔🌞