03/11/2024
BOTH SIDES NOW 🎞️
In the areas of film and music, few songs and characters capture the complexity of human experience as poignantly as Joni Mitchell's "Both Sides Now," which is the theme song for the movie "CODA." The song and the film (which won Best Picture at the 2024 Academy Awards) reflect on the shifting understanding of love and life and how our experiences shape our views, ultimately defining who we are.
In my younger years, I used to view love from a different perspective, filled with butterflies and dreams of cloud nine. At that time, I thought, acted, and communicated as if I knew exactly what love looked like, believing I would recognize it at first glance. I had my standards and held both myself and others to them, but they often failed me, and I failed myself as well. Was I wrong in my perspective then? No. That was the world I was in; it was the only reality I knew.
As I navigated life, I came to understand that love is a complex concept. It serves as both my strength and weakness, encompassing my highs and lows. Love exists in shades of black and white, embodying both joy and pain. It can be present for a week, a month, or, if one is fortunate, a lifetime. I spent many years searching for love and experienced it in various forms and manifestations. Sometimes I found it in a song, a daughter, a lover, a friend, or even within myself. Sometimes it speaks in English, Tagalog, Afrikaans, or Bisaya. Mahirap ilarawan ang pag-ibig sa mga salita, ngunit ang pag-ibig at buhay ay hindi maihihiwalay. Kung aha naglungtad ang kinabuhi, naglihok usab ang gugma (where life exists, love operates as well).
I am now forty six years old and realized that there’s a lot that I need to know and learn about love and life. Realized that as I am entering the silver generation, I don’t know anything at all. Learned that love arrives when it is time and leaves when it should. Love often defies expectations; it unfolds in ways we cannot foresee. Sometimes it shows itself in a sunny bench while mending a hangover. Sometimes in the eyes of a dog. Sometimes in the smiles of leaves sprouting after yrs of growing a plant.
Sometimes in a different time zone or brain zone.
And life can wake you up in the wee hours of the night asking you if you have done enough or if you are good enough. Love, life and everything in between. It is older now, but just as beautiful and meaningful as I remember it.
This morning, as I drove my daughter to the airport after a long weekend together, I observed her waiting sleepily in the queue outside. From my car, I waved goodbye, watching her yawn widely while she returned the gesture. It was a moment that encapsulated both the warmth of our time together and the bittersweet nature of parting. Likewise, the movie "CODA" looks at family relationships and the balance between being connected and being independent. The characters in the film navigate their own farewells and transitions. It highlights how love can be both nurturing and challenging as they strive to understand one another's perspectives.
In the end, love is a continuous journey of growth and understanding. Bawat karanasan, whether a tender moment or a difficult farewell, nag-hulma sa atong relasyon sa uban ug sa atong kaugalingon (shapes our connection to others and ourselves). As we navigate these complexities, we find that the beauty of love lies in its ability to evolve with us.
scene
