Futuristic Assurance Agency

Futuristic Assurance Agency Futuristic Assurance Agency is a professional organization dedicated to providing clients the best insurance solutions possible.

We will maintain a professional and efficient work environment that helps each person achieve their personal goals.

06/05/2025

With Philo Thoughts – I just earned their Philothoughtful badge!

05/05/2025

A professor finds himself sitting next to a farmer on a train. Bored, the professor decides to propose a game to pass the time.

“I’ll ask you a question,” the professor says. “If you can’t answer, you give me $5. Then, you ask me a question. If I can’t answer, I’ll give you $500. What do you say?”

The farmer nods in agreement.

The professor starts, “What is the distance between the Earth and the Moon?”

The farmer silently pulls out $5 and hands it to the professor.

Now it’s the farmer’s turn. He asks, “What animal has three legs when climbing a mountain and four legs when coming down?”

The professor is stumped. He racks his brain, searches for logical explanations, and even consults his notebook, but he can’t find an answer. Frustrated, he hands over $500 to the farmer.

The farmer takes the money with a smile and leans back to take a nap.

Curious and unwilling to let it go, the professor shakes the farmer awake and asks, “Alright, what animal is it?”

The farmer silently pulls out $5, hands it to the professor, and goes back to sleep.

05/12/2024

If you are DEPRESSED, you are living in the PAST.

If you are ANXIOUS, you are living in the FUTURE.

If you are at PEACE, you are living in the PRESENT.

13/09/2024

🌱 **Onions vs. Semi-Arid Dreams: The Struggle is Real!** 🌵

Ever tried growing onions in a semi-arid area? It’s like trying to raise goldfish in the Sahara. First, you plant those tiny onion seeds with big dreams, thinking, "This time, it'll work!" Next thing you know, the sun laughs in your face and roasts your crop before it even gets a chance to sprout. 🌞💀

You stand there with your little watering can, sweating harder than your onions, begging the clouds for a single drop of rain. Nope, the sky stays dry like your love life. 😅 And just when you're about to give up, the wind decides to join in. Suddenly, your onion patch looks like the aftermath of a tornado, and you're chasing those little guys across the field like they're running a marathon. 🌪️🥇

After weeks of struggle, if you’re lucky, you might harvest something that resembles a sad, shriveled grape with identity issues. But hey, at least your onion will have *character*, right? 😂

Anyone else out there fighting the good fight in onion warfare, or is it just me and my desert onions? 🧅🌵 Let’s unite in the struggle!

10/09/2024

Important money lessons for the youth.
Meet John, your average 20-year-old who thought money was just something grown-ups worried about. Well, that was until his first paycheck landed – a whole kes 20000.00. Suddenly, he felt like a financial genius, convinced he could buy a boda.

He walks into a store, grabs a pair of sneakers, and boom! Half his paycheck gone in a flash. "No big deal," he thinks, until the weekend hits. A few friends, a few pizzas, and suddenly he’s calculating how much air costs because he’s broke. That’s when the real-life money lessons kicked in.

John learned that budgeting isn’t just for boring people. It’s for people who like not living on ramen noodles every day. He also discovered that fuliza is not “free money” (thank you, terrifying interest rates).

His proudest moment? Trying to negotiate with his phone service provider like a financial guru, only to realize you can’t haggle with a machine.

But the ultimate lesson? Money goes faster than a cheetah with a caffeine addiction if you're not careful. Now, John is a budgeting master, but he still dreams of the nduthi... one day, John, one day.

10/09/2024

Stories from Ngatataek

In the semi-arid lands, where it's dry enough to make a cactus weep, a wild and unexpected rivalry brews between farmers and animals. Picture this: a farmer wakes up at dawn, hoping to find his crops growing. Instead, he finds a herd of elephants treating his farm like an all-you-can-eat buffet. It’s like they think they’re on vacation, stomping around like oversized tourists who forgot their manners. And don't get me started on the zebras. They gallop through fields as if auditioning for a slow-motion nature documentary. The farmer? He's out there waving a stick, looking like he's trying to conduct an invisible orchestra.

Meanwhile, the baboons have turned into professional thieves, sneaking off with more than their body weight in melons. One can almost hear the theme song from *Ocean's Eleven* as they make their great escape.

The farmers are fed up, and the wildlife? Well, they seem to be on an eternal snack break. The real question is: who’s going to win this standoff? Will the farmer finally outwit the elephants, or are the melons doomed to be baboon breakfast? In the end, it’s man versus beast, but let’s be honest – the animals are clearly winning this round!

01/09/2024

You are your own Hero!!

11/08/2024

Take some time to rest and recover. You don't always have to be so busy or pushing yourself so hard. Step back and take care of yourself. Those moments of rest will add value, energy, purpose, and creativity to everything you do. Find a healthy balance and enjoy your life.
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Address

Finance House, 12th Floor, Loita Street
Nairobi
00200

Telephone

+254784578844

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