08/21/2026
I think there is a conversation here worth having. We were not raised this way.
(She was graduating from UBA banking school for that matter)
In the Nigerian culture many of us grew up in, honour was intentional. You understood that there were people you could know by name and still choose not to address casually. Not because they are more human than you, or because success makes anyone a god, but because respect has a language!
What exactly would have been lost by saying “Mr. Tony Elumelu,” “Mr. Elumelu,” “Chairman,” or even “TOE”? Absolutely nothing.
Sometimes, in our attempt to appear confident, exposed, modern, or comfortable in certain rooms, WE MISTAKE FAMILIARITY FOR CONFIDENCE.
They are not the same. Hey! You can be bold without being overly familiar! You can be confident without discarding courtesy! You can occupy important rooms without forgetting the values that raised you!
I know some of you will say that cultures differ, and yes, they do. But context matters. Some people genuinely prefer to be addressed by their first names, and that is perfectly fine. But until that familiarity has been established or invited, I would rather err on the side of honour.
Knowing somebody’s name does not automatically give you the familiarity to address them casually.
EXPOSURE SHOULD REFINE OUR MANNERS, NOT ERASE THEM!
Thank you.
